I don’t just want to make a collection of weird things found on-line (go to www.Cynical-C.com for that) but I just have to share this, uh, gem. Whoever came up with Life Gems must have been playing a little too much Morrowind. Sometimes when you’re playing Morrowind, you’re a dark mage and you steal someone’s lifeforce and make a Soul Gem to facilitate your evil sorcery and character leveling. But the people behind Life Gems are actually turning human bodies into cubic zirconia. Can you imagine?
“I like your earrings.”
“Thanks, they were my grandparents,”
This is also another example of what a difference an apostrophe makes, because there’s nothing dark-wizardy about wearing jewelry that was your grandparent‘s.