When I was a kid, one of my favorite jokes was about the Viper. A lady in a big house all alone gets a call from “the viper” telling her he’ll see her tomorrow… then tonight… then in 1 hour… then in 10 minutes… and then a man arrives to vash and vipe the vindows! […]

I got my North Carolina driver’s license yesterday. I just can’t get over how polite and friendly people are here, even in the DMV. It was still a long process, partly because nothing n North Carolina moves quickly, and partly because I was trying to use a Yankee license and a Yankee checkbook, and I […]

I don’t really like to drive. I think it’s that tiny margin of error between commuting and death that really bothers me. I try to accept that while the rest of the world sees “run out to the store” as one smooth action, I see it as a series of almost insurmountable tasks. Back out, […]

I got my license several years ago in Massachusetts, but it expired while I was in China, and now that I’m home in New Jersey, I’d like to drive legally. Today I spent a couple hours on the phone with various DMV employees trying to make that happen.
My license is both expired and out-of-state, which […]

I was asked to write about the mystery of Grey in the hopes that one of you will be able to solve it. Ready?
Musician Sam Rader wrote a song called “Grey” on her album Goldstar Galaxy, and made a music video for the song, using footage found on YouTube (which strikes me as somewhat tacky […]

Stick and I were in a taxi last night, when the taxi driver turned around and told us he knew we were British (This happens a LOT… we were actually on the way to a restaurant where the waitress through we were British. I’m going to hope it’s the good manners and not the bad […]

And as I was driving home all “Check me out! I’m the greatest English teacher ever! Yeah!”, I stopped at a red light and the car behind me didn’t. Another car crash.
This time, I was in the RENTAL that we got while our car is in the shop recovering from the midnight hit-and-run, which makes […]

This morning, Stick and I woke up to the sound of someone banging on our across-the-hall neighbors’ door. At least, we assumed it was their door, since we don’t have too many friends who make unannounced Sunday-morning visits.
It was actually the police. Late last night, someone hit our parked car (which is kind of unfair […]

I tried to convince Stick that this fire engine would solve all my driving problems. Too much traffic? Turn on the flashers! No place to park? Park in the fire lane! Forget when we parked the car? Oh, yeah, it’s the GIANT RED FIRETRUCK!
Instead, we got a silver Saturn, which does turn a little more […]

On Sunday, Eric and his family had a Welcome Back party for me. Eric made a huge Bon Voyage sign and then taped “Welcome Back, The Meg!” over it. He seems to think that he’ll be able to get more use out of that one.
Being home again reminds me of one of those […]