Res Gestae, 2015

At Christmas time last year, I was working at Youth Digital, and really enjoying my work, with no expectations that anything would change in the near future. I felt like all my varied skills as an educator, game reviewer, tech journo, and game developer all came together in this perfectly tailored role. I don’t think I’ll ever fully understand what happened there, but after hearing about a massive round of pre-Christmas layoffs, and reading a scathing LinkedIn review, I’m less invested in unraveling the mystery. I was part of something cool, while it was cool, and that’s what I want to remember most from my years there.

This spring, I started taking a couple classes towards maybe, kinda, sometime getting my masters, and that sucked up a lot of my evenings and weekends, and I mostly hated it. One nice thing was taking and acing a statistics course, and being reminded that math is not particularly hard for me. Everything about our education system forces us to identify as words people or numbers people, science or creative, and no overlap allowed. So I must be a humanities person because I love fiction and writing and history so much. But I also really enjoy math and coding assignments, and it was quite satisfying to do these assignments.

Next, I’ve got to come up with a personal statement, and source some recommendation letters, and general paperwork stupidity. I make fun of my process-oriented husband a bit, sometimes I call him Capt. Action Plan or ask if he’s secretly a Vulcan, but before meeting Harold, I would never have taken on something with so many steps and so much paperwork. Because, yuck.

This summer, I went to Yangzhou Global IELTS on a summer teaching contract. A certain amount of my motivation was lying awake, night after night, stressing about what I’m doing with my life. But let’s skip over that, and focus on what a wonderful experience Yangzhou turned out to be! I stumbled into a great group of expat friends, my Mandarin was stronger this time, and my ability to roll with last-minute changes came right back. I remembered that, oh, yeah, I’m pretty good at this expat life. In Yangzhou, I spent a lot of time writing, both for editors and for myself, and I experimented with some classroom games. Also, I’m now experienced enough to call this “refining my educational methods” and not “trying out new games on a captive audience.” Progress, maturity, etc.  I spent my days off wandering over carved bridges and along the canals of the this ancient city, and ducking into gleaming, air-conditioned Starbucks to escape the steamy heat. Thank you, Yangzhou.

When I came home from China, I took some part-time work in a Chinese restaurant, which worked out better than I could have imagined.  You guys, I know so many good Mandarin insults now!

My poor husband, who loves routine and security, and is always strained by changes and upheaval (I realize that this is just a few paragraphs down from telling you that I was sad, so I went to China alone for a few months to feel better. Harold and I don’t always see the world the same way), has just started his third job of 2015. This is a good opportunity for Harold, and hopefully will be a long-term position for him. This time it’s in Boston, which is no New York City, but I shouldn’t complain too much about moving to my second-favorite city. I’m looking forward to being back in Boston, even if a Massachusetts winter isn’t always a delight. After making the best of things in North Carolina for a while, I’m so happy to be back in a city.

My NYR is, as it alway is, to write more and publish more this year that I did last year.

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North Carolina’s Still Awful, But In A Slightly Different Way

The citizens of Woodland, N.C. have spoken loud and clear: They don’t want none of them highfalutin solar panels in their good town. They scare off the kids. “All the young people are going to move out,”warned Bobby Mann, a local resident concerned about the future of his burg. Worse, Mann said, the solar panels would suck up all the energy from the Sun.

Ars Technica’s hilarious headline for this story, North Carolina Citizenry Defeat Pernicious Big Solar Plan to Suck Up the Sun, is genius. On one level, this is a good laugh at dumb southerners who don’t know basic science. The whole thing really reads like an Onion piece.

But when you look further into this story, it’s less about stupid rednecks fearing technology, and more about a couple of very wealthy people who don’t want a solar farm to ruin the view from their homes, convincing the rest that solar panels are what causes all their problems, from cancer to lack of jobs. There’s a lot of North Carolina involved in this story, from playing-rural in oversized McMansions with A/C and pretty views of the countryside, to a general belief that anything scientific is just a theory, to threatening a population with the struggles of high unemployment with the fear of jobless ghost towns, to a history of contamination and coverups like Duke Energy’s coal ash spill, and ok, sure, rednecky fear of change might be part of it too. But the end result is a couple insanely selfish people working hard to make sure we don’t improve anything here.

And that’s what I really hate about North Carolina.

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In ‘A Dark Room’

Someone on social media recommended A Dark Room, which sounded great, but I promptly forgot about it. So, thank you, whichever friend suggested this!

I love text-based adventures, probably because I can never decide if I like reading books or playing games more. Doublespeak Games’ A Dark Room opens in, well, a dark room, and most of the story is conveyed in text descriptions, with a resource table. But that format adds to the mystery, rather than interfering with it.

A lot of this game relies on countdown meters, which is one of my least favorite mechanics. Normally, I would roll my eyes and give forth a long rant about designing click-and-wait games, but by the time I realized that clicking to stoke the fire wasn’t just a lead into the starting the game, but actually a core mechanic of the game, the worldbuilding had me hooked. I found scattered teeth in the traps we set, which was enough of a hook for creepiness and for a crafting mechanic that I kept playing.

There was a certain amount of click-and-wait involved, at least until my villagers were producing enough resources that I could tab over to my homework, content that essentials like cured meat and leather were being produced at acceptable rates. Resource management is key to A Dark Room. Once you have some huts, the game’s about taking care of your villagers, so they’ll take care of your resources. Manage hunting, trapping, curing meat, feeding that meat to your iron miners, mining enough iron to make a nice iron sword, and wait, is that a laser rifle lying around in the forest? What’s that doing here? I better investigate…

There’s a lot to discover in this deceptively simple game. All the slightly-off bits of descriptive text add up to a surprising and satisfying ending.

You can get Doublespeak Games’ A Dark Room on iOs or play it n your browser.

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Essential Chinese: He Has Already Paid

lucky buddhaI’ve started working a couple days a week at a Chinese restaurant near my house. Now, I’ve complained a great deal about how freaking slow everything is in the south, but that’s working in my favor as I earn endless praise for being mildly efficient at a job that is, objectively speaking, not difficult. Mostly I take phone orders for takeout, and ring up, although I serve a little bit if it gets busy. Also, the American “service with a smile” is bullshit. Fortunately, I work for a Chinese family, who don’t have much interest in employee nametags, dress codes, or obsequious customer service. Here’s your delicious food. Eat it. Here’s your correct change. Take it. Bye.

On one hand, it’s a delight to have free gung bao ji ding, daily Chinese language practice, and a couple hours of downtime between lunch and dinner to study. With my classes going on, it’s not bad to have a job that I needn’t think about outside of work, and where the requirements are basically shower and turn up on time. On the other hand, I had hoped to be doing something a bit more prestigious than food service by my thirties…

When I took the job, I expected to be more helpful with my Chinese, since my strongest vocab involves food, but it turns out that wildly different regional accents and the fast pace restaurant service make it too hard for my baby Mandarin to keep up. I can help out with the occasional request for mai dan or da bao, but besides that, my Chinese skills haven’t been much benefit to the restaurant. (Unless you count the amusement the rest of the staff gets from my toneless Mandarin… and they have stopped ni de zhongwen hen hao! and started telling me I sound like a idiot.)

The advantage has gone the other way, and working here has been really beneficial for my language learning. Learning Chinese in a classroom is usually being told to memorize something, and then repeat it back to the teacher. There is no variation or application of material, just recitation of the assigned sentences. A dialogue will always begin with ni hao because that’s how the book has it.  In real life, a person could open a conversation with hello, good morning, nice day isn’t it?, where do I catch the 6 from here?, or watch out, your shoelace is untied. I just don’t have the Chinese skills for that.

But in the restaurant, there are limited common conversations, with some variations. For example, a lot of my job involves handing people their takeout orders (Oh! And I can read the Chinese dishes on the receipts! Food vocab and a limited number of possible options!) and ringing up customers, so I regularly hear and use ta ge chien le ma? (has he/she already paid?) and the answer ge le. or ta bu ge le. The repetition and all the slight variations of usage really make this ideal circumstances for language acquisition.

Also, Mandarin swearing. You guys, I have learned so many different insults and swears! This is a great job!

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Come for the Zombie Slayage, Stay for the Survivor Stories

Recently I put Rebuild 3: Gangs of Deadville on my phone to play during quiet times at work. (Eventually I’m going to write you a post about my current job, and the hilarious moments as a Mandarin-speaking, er, a Mandarin-understanding white girl working in a Chinese restaurant, but I have been busy with classes and said job, so here are my thoughts on zombie strategy instead.) I picked Rebuild 3 because I really liked Northway Games’ Rebuild.  I’m not really a zombie fan, but luckily I was assigned to review it for Hardcore Droid. and really enjoyed playing it. I jumped at the chance to write a Rebuild strategy guide, too, and then here’s a long interview I did with Sarah Northway, also for HD.

Rebuild 3 is still about a band of survivors reclaiming the world after a zombie apocalypse. Survivors can be assigned tasks for the day, like scavenging for supplies, repairing the power plant, crafting materials, or of course killing some zombies. This creates that addictive just-one-more-turn feeling we all love in Civ, but Rebuild adds character development and narrative to the usual strategy game experience. Oh, and I mean the old-fashioned kind of strategy game, where you apply strategic thinking to taking territory or planning attackings, not the appointment-style kind of “strategy game” where you have to wait in real time for development of buildings and units, or when you’re prompted to spend real money to get necessary resources. There’s no premium currency, daily check-ins or click-and-wait here.

cutie babyNew survivors can be rescued from zombie territory, or they can make their own way to the fort and ask to join.  Adults can immediately be put to work, scavenging, farming, killing zed or whatever the band of survivors needs. Lost childen can also be rescued and assigned an adult guardian to look after them. I found a lost little girl and adopted her, and it was the cutest part of the zombie apocalypse. There’s a particular trait that makes a survivor enjoy caretaking, and both genders are equally likely to have this trait. (My aesthetic is buff zombie-slaying dudes looking after cute lil babies. What?)

Survivors come with a randomly generated name, appearance, and outfit, but, as you play, you can give them a weapon and an offhand item for extra stats, and they’ll earn perks every so often. These perks are great, blending character backstory and stat improvements, but I had such fun discovering them that I don’t want to say anything else about them.

Players can rename survivors, but definitely don’t take too much care with this because survivors, especially soldiers, don’t always have a long life expectancy. I actually felt really sad when some of my survivors died, especially if they’d been with me a long time, or they were born in the fort, or I got them killed doing something too risky.

post apo boyfriendMy first Rebuild boyfriend got annoying. He kept asking me when we were going to commit to each other, so I felt him behind when I went to the next city.  NOT GOING TO MARRY YOU, APOCALYPSE BOYFRIEND! Except I met a new boyfriend in the next city and I decided to marry him. Moving on…

As your survivors reclaim territory and grow their base, they’ll encounter zombies and as well as other groups of humans. Gustav the trader is back, and so’s the biker cult from the first Rebuild. The Government, a new faction devoted to reestablishing bureaucracy in post-apocalyptic Canada, really reminded me of Maia Sepp’s An Etiquette Guide To The End Times.  Factions can be friendly or hostile, and relationships will be affected by your fort’s government choices. I had to the run the Last Judgement out of town a few times because they wanted our women to stay off dangerous tasks.

The tech tree is the weak spot in a really great game. Well, the tech itself is great, with clever names for useful upgrades. But in each new city, there are new available technologies to research, while the tech tree resets to zero, so players need to re-research technologies they already had. I was annoyed that I couldn’t research anything cool early on, and I couldn’t even see greyed out future techs in early cities. It also made no narrative sense that my engineers all forgot how to make zombie traps or watchtowers every time we went to a new city. Why, engineers, why?

Overall, Rebuild 3 is a great strategy game mixed with an open-ended, post-apocalyptic storyline.

mcnoodles

 

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Meaning, Translation, Scraps of Paper

by trainRight now, I’m using the backpack I bought in China for my notebook and textbooks, which makes dragging a schoolbag to work in order to study on my breaks slightly less depressing. It’s lovely because I keep finding Yangzhou ephemera in my Carrboro life, and I could use the reminders of my adventure back at home. I find my loyalty card from Sir Coffee or an yi yuan coin tucked in one of the pockets, and I remember that I’m someone who lives abroad and has foreign adventures, even if, at that moment, I’m also someone who’s looking for her car keys.

I’ve ended up with my Yangzhou-Shanghai train ticket as a bookmark, and my Chinese coworker happened to see it.

“A rail ticket?” he asked. “No foreigners ever take the train!”

I smiled, because this is basically independent confirmation that I see The Real ChinaTM and not the lame Tourist China. (Also, I’m still insanely proud of myself for speaking enough Mandarin to buy a ticket. That was several sentences in a row, you guys.)

“Eww, you paid full price for this.” he said, “Why would you do that?”

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Comforting Mini-Puzzler in iOs ‘GrowRecovery’

grow recovery progess

I’ve been a bit busy and haven’t written too much here (and another eyeroll at another class is probably on the way), but I recently wrote about playing Grow Recovery for (The) Absolute.

Grow Recovery, though, adds a little narrative to the Grow game formula, showing an exhausted little figure in need of comfort and healing. It’s a simple human outline, but the task of looking after him is surprisingly moving. Each of the items available will make him feel better in a different way, Give him a blanket, and he’ll wrap himself up. Give him a friend, and the friend will help heal him. I think the animation at the beginning of the game is meant to show that the little grow guy is exhausted, but it’s easy to see all kinds of self-care and recovery in this tiny charming game.

The blanket levels up into a pillow and a bed, while the friend levels up into a family. Add food and the friend will cook a nourishing meal. (I was not entirely pleased by the little pink figure cooking a meal for the little blue figure, but since I express my affection through cooking food for people I love, well, that’s a bit of gender stereotyping I can accept.) All the interactions make an adorable self-care mini-sim for your phone.

from (The)Absolute Mag

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Kitchen Chinese

Just finished reading Kitchen Chinese by Ann Mah. I was pretty much hooked as soon as the protagonist explains she only knows food words in Chinese. Hey, me too!

This turned out to be an awesome story about Beijing expat life, with so many of the tiny details right. Going to Jenny Lu’s for essential home comforts. Eating Beijing duck. Ordering without a menu because all homestyle places have the same dishes.  Wait, there was some non-food-related stuff too… The part where the Westerner speaks perfectly good Chinese, and the nervous waitress confirms it with the Chinese-looking person at the table.  An angry, hard-drinking Australian expat with a well-hidden heart of gold (ahem). Working in China and how much is guanxi, not qualifications.

A lot of really wonderful novels set in China present a skewed sense of learning the language. I’m not talking about the ones where the foreigner just picks up Mandarin by osmosis (ugh), but usually for a narrative to work, the character’s language skills progress in simple tiers, from random sounds to what John Pasden calls “Fine, it’s a language” to Horrible Spoken Chinese to Not That Great and onwards to Fluency. Kitchen Chinese really showed the terrible frustration in needing a particular word in a normal second-language day, or in getting the tones just slightly wrong and saying something completely different.  Of course, as a waiguoren, even when I screw up the basics, most Chinese people can’t stop telling me how great my Mandarin is (pretty sure that’s Chinese for You Tried!), while the ABC protag of Kitchen Chinese gets just the opposite reaction. Beijingren keep telling her to study more, while other Americans condescending tell her that her English is good.

Most of the story is set in Beijing, but there’s a segment set in Shanghai that reminded me so strongly of Adeline Yen Mah’s Chinese Cinderella, and, if I’m honest, of my recent trip to Shanghai when I walked around the French Concession thinking of the family in that book. It was a nice sidetrack, but didn’t fully mesh with the Beijing expat adventures in the rest of novel, and I was a bit confused. Anyway, at the end of the book, I saw that Ann Mah, the author of Kitchen Chinese, is the daughter of Adeline Yen Mah, the author of Chinese Cinderella, which made everything make sense.

Anyway, you should read it, if you like food and Beijing.

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Attack with PBR and Vinyl Records in Indie Game “Hipster Zombies”

hipster-zombies

Hipster Zombies, available on iOS and Android from indie devs Sharkbomb Studios, is yet another game inviting players to battle oncoming hordes of zombies. But these are hipsterzombies, and in addition to brains, they want old records, black plastic glasses, retro bicycles and cans of PBR!

Players stand behind a makeshift barricade and try to defend their neighborhood (Is it Williamsburg? Greenpoint? Probably is.) from oncoming zombie waves by throwing hipster gear at the zombies. Mechanics are classic and the controls are simple—you’ll move side-to-side with your left hand, while choosing what to throw with your right. The game is free but monetizes on players’ in-app purchases of hipster gear like vinyl records and PBR cans, much like Brooklyn does.

Enjoy the simple game and hipster jokes as you deploy your zombie-fighting powers of irony to battle the undead!

Halloween reprint, from my story Attack with PBR and Vinyl Records in Indie Game “Hipster Zombies” on (the) Absolute

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Homework Memories

yangzhou-nightI wrote, in Yangzhou, about how annoying my online class is, but I don’t think I wrote about actually doing the work. One evening in Yangzhou, I was trying to finish my homework so I could go out with my friends. Everyone was meeting at a bar by the water, in fact, most of the crew was already there, and I was hoping to finish my work in time to join them. I remember sitting my room, and texting updates to my friend Rob, who lived upstairs from me, so we could share a cab downtown to meet our friends.

Finishing my homework so I could go out with my friends is not exactly how I expected to spend my thirties, and I’m not sure I expected to do it in China, either, but I plowed through my math problems and met up with Rob. We had a great chat, and an easy ride over, and met up with friends for drinks and laughs by the gorgeous canal. Some parts of Yangzhou are how I imagine ancient China, the hanging willows and curved bridges and arched roofs, and everything now is all outlined in colored neon lights, reflecting in the water. I think about that a lot back in the US.

Anyway, I’m finishing up this class at home now, and every time I open my math lab account, I think of that evening.

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