So I Read “The Bride Test” and Quit My Job

Last June, while I was teaching at the university, I read The Bride Test. This is a sweet romance full of misunderstandings and loads of chemistry. Khai’s mother is afraid her son will never get a girlfriend, never fall in love, never get married and never have children, so she pays Esme Tran, a hardworking young woman from a poor neighborhood in Vietnam, to come to the US and try to be Khai’s fiancé for one summer. She hopes that a little fake dating will lead to real romance. Khai, an accountant with autistic patterns in his every day life, doesn’t fight his mom’s plan, but makes it clear he’s never gotten close to anyone and doesn’t plan to start. Esme wants the money for her family back home, and maybe a green card, too, so she’s willing to give it a try.

It’s a fun story, with engaging characters and new twists on the usual romance plot. The end of Esme’s visa puts a dramatic timeline on this story. Khai’s autistic worldview makes him more sympathetic, even when he’s pushing everyone away, and presents unusual problems.  Esme’s got her own secrets. (But would all of their romantic problems have been solved with an honest three-minute conversation? Also yes.)

In this book, there’s a fairly minor character who’s an adult ESL teacher and there’s a fairly minor scene where the international students have bubble tea together. It’s barely a page or two, but it reminded me so strongly of those times with my former students when I taught adult ESL. It’s just one of the experiences Esme has in the US, but long after I read the book, I kept thinking of that scene.

I’d been pretty excited to get my uni job. After 5 years of teaching adult ESL, I was starting to feel like I’d taught the same lessons 10,000 times, and I was ready to move on.  I should be more ambitious. New challenges! New opportunities! And money. I know teaching’s supposed to be a calling or whatever, but I quite like having money.

It was just fine teaching college students instead of adult learners. I did not love teenagers submitting blank documents as assignments and pretending there was a mysterious technical glitch, but no job is perfect.

But reading this fairly minor scene in The Bride Test about international ESL students and their adult-ed teacher almost made me feel sick. Thinking about those memories in my own life, and how they’re not my every day any more. A lot of what I missed was just pre-pandemic teaching, in person, with groups, changing partners and moving around the classroom, with Kahoot games and roleplays, with matching and card games, and sometime a coffee or tea with students after class. A lot of that’s just not pandemic-possible, of course, but I realize I still miss teaching adult students.

Adult ed doesn’t get a lot of respect, and I often feel like I’m not ambitious enough, that I should be striving for a job at a name college.  And ESL teaching gets even less respect.  Many people think because they can speak English, they could teach grammar, design activities for student practice, plan lessons, and manage a multi-cultural classroom too.

I thought about this for the rest of the summer, and in August, I saw an ad looking for an adult ESL teacher.  (See how I said that? Like I was just reading the paper one day and not actively searching for a local adult ESL job.) I like my new job just as much as I could possibly like Zoom teaching and my students are learning just as much as they could possibly learn with Zoom classes.

Anyway, I read The Bride Test and then I quit my job.